Substantiated Anger

“Most jobs aren’t glamorous.”

John WoodenThose four words have bounced through my head several times during the last few weeks. I noticed them as I scanned a collection of notes for The Essential Wooden by one of my favorite leaders, former UCLA basketball coach John Wooden.

Though this phrase was in reference to team building and helping each person understand his or her role, it has been little comfort in this era of my life. As tears of frustration and disconnection well up in my eyes, feeling as though I just have to do something to make money angers me.

I am dissatisfied with the idea that work should be a passionless means to an end, a way to gather money eight hours a day and then snap the day’s stress into my briefcase for the ride home. The idea that misery with monetary benefit is how I should spend a third of my weekdays turns my stomach.

I have tired of feeling guilty for desiring to be different and silently apologizing for going against the flow into cubicle hell. I have a seething disdain for the idea each of us is here to survive life and wistfully hope for something better, to dream of a time in the past where a different decision would have made for a positive experience.

I have chosen to believe differently.

Instead of strapping into a chair and filling out TPS reports in the hopes my 401(k) will last me from 65 until I die, I’m pursuing me. I’m loosening the shackles of old expectations, shedding the weight of old thoughts that pushed me toward delusions of money and grandeur. I must die knowing I lived and, though I may be far from what I’m made to do for this day, endeavor each morning to take another step closer to my purpose, my dream and my service to God.

So, I’ve chosen to do my damnedest to remember this next time my brain reels at the thought of a shift at the office supply store or teaching a class just for the money.

“…we are all given a certain potential unique to each one of us. Our first responsibility is to make the utmost effort to bring forth that potential in service to our team.”

Step into the game. We’re all on the same team.

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